In Luke’s gospel narrative, he records that Jesus grew in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and man (Luke 2:52). For some Christians, it can be difficult or uncomfortable to think of Jesus as needing to grow in these ways. That is part of the wonder and the mystery of the incarnation—God taking on human flesh, along with its limitations. Just as He needed to learn to crawl, walk, read, and write, so He needed to grow in wisdom and spiritual understanding. If the sinless Son of God needed to grow, it should not be surprising that we as fallen human beings should need to grow spiritually. This growth occurs as we mature in the areas discussed below.

Growth in Knowledge of God, His Ways, and His Will

Knowledge of God, including His character, His ways, and His will is essential to spiritual growth. The Apostle Paul’s understanding of this principle led him to pray for the believers in Colossae as follows: “We have not stopped praying for you and asking God to fill you with the knowledge of His will through all spiritual wisdom and understanding. And we pray this in order that you might live a life worthy of the Lord and may please Him in every way, bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God” (Colossians 1:9-10).

Paul’s prayer for these believers provides insight into the dynamics of spiritual growth. The more we grow in spiritual wisdom, the more we will live pleasing to God, doing the good things He desires us to do. This action leads to a greater knowledge of God and more spiritual wisdom. And so the circle of growth continues.

This knowledge of God is interactive and experiential, not just an accumulation of information. A person can study the sport of scuba diving, can watch others scuba dive, and can even speak intelligently about scuba diving with other people, but until he actually puts on the equipment and dives into the water, he is not a scuba diver. And though he may study advanced diving techniques, he will not become a skilled diver until he has spent many hours in the water. Similarly, there are many people who know much about what the Bible teaches, but they have not embraced the teachings of scripture as truth in their hearts and put it into action. They may know about God, but they do not know God.

The early focus of learning is centered on such subjects as God’s character, who Jesus is, and how to walk with Jesus daily. These topics are necessary for a healthy relationship and lay the foundation for further growth. As we grasp a basic knowledge of who God is, we learn how to please Him and follow His leading. We gain this knowledge through daily interaction with God in the circumstances of life.

Growth in Ministry Skills and Abilities

As mentioned above, the point of acquiring knowledge is so that it can be put into action. One of the ways we act on our knowledge of God is to minister to others or, as Paul puts it, “to bear fruit in every good work” (Colossians 1:10). In the early phases of the Christian’s walk, our focus needs to be meeting the practical needs of others. We see this principle in the way Jesus taught His followers how to minister. When His disciples were new believers, Jesus gave them practical responsibilities such as dispensing food, providing transportation, controlling the crowds, and bringing their friends to learn about Him.

Jesus knew that the best way for His disciples to learn was through on-the-job training. Many businesses and other types of organizations have discovered this principle as well and are delivering more training on the job and less in the classroom. Even schools and universities are beginning to rely less on formal instruction and more on training. Sadly, many churches do not yet seem to understand the importance of this principle. What is learned in worship services and Bible study classes is essential, but it must be balanced by practical application. It is important that newer believers have the opportunity to learn and practice ministry skills under the guidance of more mature believers.

As believers grow spiritually, God often increases their ministry abilities and opportunities. This pattern is clearly seen in how Jesus trained His disciples. Although He began with giving them simple acts of service to perform, He gradually increased their responsibilities. He sent them out on their own to minister and gave them positions of leadership within the larger band of followers.

Christ not only gave His followers hands-on training, He also set the example. His days on earth were marked by selfless service to others. In his gospel account, Mark quotes Jesus as saying that, “even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life as a ransom for many” (Mark 10:45). Jesus’ servant leadership is a theme that surfaces frequently in the gospel accounts, as he healed the sick, fed the hungry, humbly interacted with the outcasts of society, taught His followers and, finally, laid down His life that others might have eternal life.

Another area of ministry is sharing with others what Christ has done in our lives. Some believers are intimidated by the thought of this, but it really should be quite natural. If a new restaurant in town has great food, we tell others about it. If we find a diet that works, we spread the news. If we stumble across a helpful gardening tip, we pass it on to other gardeners. How much more should we desire to tell others when we have found the Source of life?

This is what the early followers of Jesus did. Andrew found his brother Simon Peter and said, “We have found the Messiah.” Phillip found Nathanael and said, “We have found Him of whom Moses and the prophets wrote.” The Samaritan woman whom Jesus met at the well in Sychar told the townspeople, “Come see the one who told me everything I ever did.” The blind man healed by Jesus told the religious leaders, “This one thing I know. I was blind but now I see!” This is what we should do⎜simply relate to others what Christ has done in our lives.

Growth in Faith and Trust in Christ

A further area of equipping is growth in our willingness and ability to exercise faith and trust in Christ. Growth in faith means growing in strength of conviction and quickness to obey. Simply put, it means putting into action what we believe to be true. In fact, the putting into action is the proof that we truly do believe something to be so.

Some years back, there was a tightrope walker who performed unbelievable feats high above the ground. A promoter heard of this performer and offered him a substantial sum of money to walk a tightrope across Niagara Falls. The event was widely promoted and drew large crowds of people, eager to see the daring (or folly) of this artist. When the moment came, the performer calmly walked above the rushing waters, to the wild cheers of the crowd. Then he walked across blindfolded. The cheers grew even louder, almost drowning out the roar of the falls. It appeared that the show was over, but the artist had one act left to perform. He had a wheelbarrow raised to the rope and, addressing the crowd, asked if they believed he could walk the wheelbarrow across the falls. The crowd responded enthusiastically. Then he asked for a volunteer to get into the wheelbarrow, and the crowd fell silent. All had said they believed, but none was willing to act on that belief. As Christians, we demonstrate our faith by a ready willingness to “get into the wheelbarrow.”

Growth in trust means applying our faith in more and more areas. It is one thing to recognize Christ as our only way of salvation and place our trust in Him as savior. It is quite another to begin to trust Him in all areas of our lives. After all, we have grown up learning to be independent and to trust in ourselves—our knowledge, our abilities, and so on. However, as the writer of Proverbs reminds us, we need to trust in the Lord with all our hearts and not lean on our own understanding (Proverbs 3:5). Admittedly, this is hard to do. But it is an important part of the maturing process. God, in His wisdom and providence, continues to bring circumstances into our lives that give us opportunities to trust Him and expand our faith. As we encounter these circumstances, God provides the resources to deal with them, as we take a risk and trust Him.

James Brown, pastor of Evangeline Baptist Church in Wildsville, Louisiana tells the following story. “Some years ago when I was learning to fly, my instructor told me to put the plane into a steep and extended dive. I was totally unprepared for what was about to happen. After a brief time the engine stalled, and the plane began to plunge out-of-control. It soon became evident that the instructor was not going to help me at all. After a few seconds, which seemed like eternity, my mind began to function again. I quickly corrected the situation. Immediately I turned to the instructor and began to vent my fearful frustrations on him. He very calmly said to me, “There is no position you can get this airplane into that I cannot get you out of. If you want to learn to fly, go up there and do it again.” At that moment God seemed to be saying to me, “Remember this. As you serve Me, there is no situation you can get yourself into that I cannot get you out of. If you trust me, you will be all right.”

It seems that God sometimes gets us into tough situations just so we can learn to trust Him. The Bible certainly provides enough examples, whether it be Abraham standing over Isaac on the altar, the Israelites huddled on the banks of the Red Sea with the Egyptians in fierce pursuit, Daniel and his friends in the fiery furnace, Jesus’ disciples fighting a raging storm on the Sea of Galilee, or any number of other events. One of the most important things that every Christian must learn is that God can be trusted, regardless of circumstances that would make it appear otherwise. Until a person reaches this place of trust, he will be limited in what he is able and willing to do for God.

Conclusion

To become mature we need to grow in our knowledge of God, in service, in faith, and in trust. As always, God provides everything we need to grow. He has set the example, His Word and His Spirit teach us, and He brings circumstances into our lives to accomplish His purposes. Even the faith required for growth is a gift from God (Ephesians 2:8). We can rejoice that He graciously provides us with everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of Him. (2 Peter 1:3)

Application Suggestions:

• Read John 2:1-11. How do you think this situation impacted the growth of the disciples?

• Think of a situation in your life that is impacting your spiritual growth. Write down evidences of growth that is occurring because of this situation.

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An ancient Buddhist town sits on the crossroads of a major highway near the site of a new university. Thanks to the help of Carroll and Shirley, a new church sits at this important intersection, the only Christian witness in a dark part of the country. Young Pastor “T” and his fledgling congregation are part of a 3% Christian minority in this “closed” country. They represent a giant step toward the salvation of their people. But according to the law, they cannot share the gospel with their neighbors and often experience persecution because of their faith.

Nevertheless, small pockets of gospel witness like this one are springing up all over the country as young believers are discipled and sent out from a small seminary in the capital. Eleven of these young men and women graduated from the bible college seminary on Saturday. Gary Rich, who accompanied the Coakleys, gave the commencement address to the graduates and 300 attendees. On Monday, Carroll and Shirley began training several of the students for their month-long deployment to Buddhist villages throughout the country. Shirley and Billie conducted 2 days of training for the women of the church.

On their way home, the Coakleys and the Richs visited two missionary couples in Singapore for a refreshing time of fellowship and prayer. They write, “We felt God’s anointing on us in everything with which we were involved… The Riches could hardly believe all of the success of T’s ministry and how it has been used by God… WDA has been a great part of it through the power of God’s Spirit.”

WDA labors alongside these brothers and sisters in offering training, resources, and prayer. It is our heart’s earnest desire that through this crucial equipping ministry, this closed country might open its doors to the gospel of Jesus Christ. There’s a lot to be done,” says Carroll, “but few sowers. There are not a lot of people who want to go and have the commitment.”

Pray for the spreading of the gospel and the ongoing work of helping faithful brothers and sisters around the world grow to maturity. Consider making the Coakleys and especially the people in “closed” areas of the world a part of your regular prayers! Work such as this doesn’t happen without the support and prayers of God’s people.

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The Goal of Spiritual Growth Is Christlike Character.

It is natural for the new believer to ask: “What does spiritual maturity look like?” The answer is that it looks like Jesus Christ. He not only is the object of our faith, but He is the object of our growth. From the beginning, God’s desire has been for those who believe in Christ to be conformed to His likeness (Romans 8:29). As we grow in Christ and become more like Him, those around us should be able to see His image reflected in us (2 Corinthians 3:18). This does not mean that we will become physically like Him with the same appearance, mannerisms, or manner of speaking. Rather, it means that we will become like Him in our attitudes and in our actions.

This is a lofty goal indeed and can be intimidating, especially to the new believer. However, it is important to remember that God provides us with more than the minimum daily requirements for our spiritual growth. In fact, 2 Peter 1:3 says that God’s divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness. Some Christians find this hard to believe, especially when they begin to experience challenges or frustration in their spiritual lives. And, sadly, there are sometimes people who mistakenly tell them that they don’t have everything they need⎜that to really grow they need something more. This “something more” may be a mystical experience, a special anointing from the Holy Spirit, a special degree of wisdom or knowledge, or something else. Regardless of how well intended this advice may be, it is a form of spiritual intimidation and should be rejected as such. Just as a healthy baby is born with all the parts it needs to grow and develop normally, so we are born spiritually with all we need to grow in Christ.

Spiritual Growth Occurs Gradually, in Phases

One error to avoid is thinking that God has not given us everything we need to grow. An equally dangerous wrong belief is that growth will occur overnight. Just as a newborn baby develops gradually and only after much nourishment and the proper care, so it is with the “babe” in Christ — the new Christian. We should expect to drink milk before we can eat meat, and to crawl before we can walk. God understands this better than we do, and He patiently works with us as He conforms us to the image of His Son. We see this principle illustrated in the approach Christ took with His disciples.

A careful study of the life and ministry of Christ will show that He was deliberate in the way that He related to and worked with His disciples. Because each of the Gospel writers recorded the life of Christ from his own perspective, it can be difficult to see a pattern simply by reading through the New Testament. However, when the Gospel accounts are combined into a chronological narrative, it is clear that Jesus taught His disciples things that were appropriate for each phase of growth, and that He moved them through successive phases. It is also clear that Jesus intended this pattern to be repeated as, before His return to heaven, He commanded His followers to make disciples in all nations, teaching the same things He had taught.

While people may label these phases differently, they can be described as follows:

1) Establishing Faith ⎜The necessary first step for anyone to become a disciple of Christ is to repent of his sins and former way of life and to trust in Christ as his savior. This event is referred to in Scripture as being born again (John 3). Regardless of whether a person comes to faith at age eight or eighty-eight, he becomes a newborn “babe” in Christ.

2) Laying Foundations ⎜The focus of this early phase in the life of the believer is gaining a better understanding of who Christ is and how to follow Him. As the new Christian learns more of Christ’s nature and character, He learns to trust Him not only for salvation but for other things as well. During this phase, Jesus invited his disciples to spend more time with Him so that He could reveal Himself more fully to them.

3) Equipping for Ministry ⎜In this phase, the disciple learns to serve others and engages in ministry opportunities under the guidance of more mature believers. Jesus’ call to His disciples, “Follow me and I will make you fishers of men,” indicates that He was moving them to the next phase of growth. Jesus took His disciples with Him as He went about teaching and ministering to people.

4) Developing New Leaders ⎜As the believer progresses to this phase, he is ready to take responsibility for the spiritual well being of others. Jesus’ time during this phase with His disciples was characterized by teaching about how to live in His Kingdom. Also, He designated twelve of His closest disciples as apostles and sent them out on their own to preach the Kingdom of God and to minister to people’s needs.

There Are Two Dimensions to Spiritual Growth ⎜Equipping and Restoring.

Not only does spiritual growth occur in phases, but it also involves two dimensions⎜equipping and restoring. The equipping dimension includes building knowledge, skills, and abilities into peoples’ lives, while the restoring dimension refers to regaining the image of God by developing emotional and relational health. The phases discussed above relate primarily to the equipping dimension, which is characterized by growth in such areas as personal knowledge of Christ and His ways, the ability to trust God, and the ability to minister to others.

The second dimension relates to our emotional and relational well being. This aspect is necessary because, when a person comes to faith in Christ, he brings all of his baggage along with him. Some of us bring little baggage and some of us bring a lot, but none of us has the emotional and relational health necessary to grow to full maturity in Christ. As can be seen in the way Christ worked with His disciples, God does not wait to complete the equipping dimension before He begins to work on the restoring dimension. Rather, the two are interrelated and He works on them at the same time. In fact, it must be so because one’s spiritual growth is limited if emotional and relational issues are not addressed.

Because of our own sin nature and because we live in a fallen world, we develop unhealthy patterns of thinking and behaving as we make our way through life. Many of these patterns develop as we try to protect ourselves from the inevitable hurts that come our way. God wants to restore us to emotional health, not just so we can minister effectively for Him, but also primarily so that we can enjoy our relationship with Him and with others. There is no relational health without emotional health.

As in all other areas, Jesus is our model of emotional and relational well being. It is an understatement to say that not everyone liked Him, but the way He related to friends and foes alike was healthy. His words and actions were characterized by integrity, purity, and honesty. And His emotions betrayed integrity as well. As G. Walter Hansenin writes in Christianity Today, “I am spellbound by the intensity of Jesus’ emotions: Not a twinge of pity, but heartbroken compassion; not a passing irritation, but terrifying anger; not a silent tear, but groans of anguish; not a weak smile, but ecstatic celebration. Jesus’ emotions are like a mountain river cascading with clear water. My emotions are more like a muddy foam or a feeble trickle.” Because of the hurts in our past and the resulting protective behaviors we have engaged in, many of us can probably identify more closely with the description of Mr. Hansenin’s emotions than we can with those of Jesus.

The Christian life is all about relationships. When we place our faith in Christ, we enter into relationship with Him. We also become part of the family of God. The Bible speaks of believers as members of the “body of Christ.” Much of the teaching of the New Testament revolves around how we are to relate to one another. If we have not developed emotional and relational health, these new relationships can be very challenging. The good news is that these new relationships provide a wonderful opportunity for us to grow. Believers should make up a restoring community, where we demonstrate unconditional acceptance and speak the truth to one another in love (Ephesians 4:15).

Conclusion

In light of these teachings, our primary concern should be that we see consistent progress over time in our spiritual growth and that this growth is evident in all areas of our lives. We should imitate the Apostle Paul’s mindset as reflected when he wrote, “…I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 3:12-14) The picture Paul paints is of an athlete who is straining every muscle as he pushes toward the goal. We should exhibit the same determination in our spiritual lives.

However, we should not become preoccupied with growth for growth’s sake. We should not become like the anxious six-year-old boy who every morning jumps out of bed and runs over to the growth chart taped to the back of his door to see if he has grown any taller over night. If we continue to press toward the mark, growth will come. And, each day we can rejoice in the confidence that He who has begun this good work in us will carry it through to completion (Philippians 1:6).

Application Suggestions:

• What evidences of change in attitudes/actions/beliefs have you seen in your life since you became a Christian that indicate you are progressing toward Christlikeness?

• Meditate on Philippians 1:6, thanking God that He is at work in your life and will continue to work.

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1.  Focus on the Urgent and Not Important Things
7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey points out that many leaders focus on the wrong things. Leaders can be tied up in the Urgent and the Not Important. A good leader learns to focus on the Not Urgent and Important things.

One place this shows up in ministry is training and discipling leaders. As a church planter, discipler, pastor or ministry leader it is very easy to allow the most urgent loudest voices determine your priorities. Jesus pulled away at some of the most urgent times to focus on his men. Train your leaders by focusing on the Important and not-urgent task of investing in a few young leaders. It will pay off down the road.

Solutions: Set some goals and boundaries and ask someone you admire how they handle the brush fires?

2.  Avoid Times of Renewal

I deal with pastors and worship leaders who seem to forget that they work during worship! But rarely have time to worship themselves. Certainly there are times during our worship services that renew us as leaders. If you don’t have additional time to renew, you are in danger of slowly draining your tank.

Solutions: Take time to renew each week. Take a sabbath rest on a morning without your phone. Journal, read, pray, play.

Tim Keller – wisdom and sabbath rest

3.  Forget you have a Family
If you forget you have a family you will end up having to do lots of work later. Just as a workaholic needs his career to make his life meaningful, many pastors find meaning in success in ministry. Families suffer, marriages die, children rebel. On the other hand a family that is healthy can be a blessing to you. Look out! Your wife and children need you! Unfortunately the signs are not always easy to see!

Solutions: Ask your wife how you should change your schedule to spend more time with the family. Then get someone other than her to hold you accountable to this priority.

Answers for Pastor wives = Boundaries in Ministry-

4.  Make sure everything comes across your desk
If you have started a new ministry you may think that your ministry can’t survive without your insight and vision. (Remember #1) Great leaders learn to focus on training people who are able to take the baton and run the race with the team. If you have to review every piece of information, every ministry plan, go to every event, and personally oversee every leader, you haven’t learned to lead.

Solutions: Sit down with your leadership team individually and clarify their responsibilities and what ways you will give oversight. Prepare a contingency plan should things not go according to plan. Determine beforehand what balls you are willing to pick up. People will fail. Let people learn from mistakes. Use the opportunity for their training. Plan debriefing into every project.

Audio clip from John Piper -

John Piper – Post – Pastors don’t micromanage your church

5.  Never let anyone know you.

The great american cowboy riding off into the sunset! We love that loner rugged individual. Sorry this isn’t Jesus’ model of leadership. If no one knows you, get ready to fall hard. You are a target! The enemy loves to isolate you from the pack and bring you down. Secret sin. Prideful independence. Isolated pain and hurt. All lead to failure.

Solutions: Pray for a Jonathan or a Barnabus. No one will grow without having a partner and encourager! Cultivate a life that understands the gospel! When I understand that I am both a sinner in need of mercy and a son loved completely by my heavenly father I don’t have to protect my reputation. Freedom and Openness to others only happens when I can take my mask and armor off.

Video: Tullian Tchividjian – Association of Biblical Counselors

ABC & Tullian Tchividjian – How do you see pastors struggling in isolation and what can help that struggle? from Assoc. of Biblical Counselors on Vimeo.

So what would you add to the list? What have you seen in your experience? What Solutions can you share?

It is important to remember that God is not our enemy. We are not playing some game of hide and seek where we are desperately seeking to find something that God is enjoying hiding from us. Christ’s words to His disciples the night before his crucifixion should be an encouragement to us. He reminded them that they had entered a new relationship with Him, and He had now taken them into His confidence and revealed the Father’s will to them. We enjoy the same close relationship with our Lord and can rest assured that He also desires to make the Father’s business known to us.

While there are no easy answers and no set formulas to follow, we can understand the will of God by humbly responding to the truth He reveals. Following are some of the most common ways God reveals His will.

The Bible

In his second letter to Timothy, the Apostle Paul reminded him that the holy Scriptures are given by God to make us wise and to help us discern what we should do. 2 Timothy 3:16-17 says: “All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.” Or, as the New Living Translation puts it, “It is God’s way of preparing us in every way, fully equipped for every good thing God wants us to do.” Not only does Scripture reveal the character of God and how we can grow in godliness, it also prepares us for the specific things that He wants us to do.

The Apostle Peter told his readers that they should desire the pure spiritual milk of the Word as a newborn baby desires his mother’s milk. It is the primary means of growth for the believer. Regular, daily feeding will ensure that our thinking is informed by the Word. Not only is understanding the will of God necessary for spiritual growth, but spiritual growth is important in understanding the will of God. As the believer matures in his Christian walk, he gains more insight into the Word of God and is better able to understand and to apply the principles found in it.

Broadly speaking, when attempting to discern the will of God, the believer should look in Scripture for general principles to apply rather than expecting to find specific guidance. Humorous stories are told of individuals who have opened the Bible, put their fingers on the page, and then made a decision based on whatever they happened to read first. One such man, who was deeply in debt, found that his finger landed on Chapter 11 and he went out and filed bankruptcy. As unlikely as this story may be, it does remind us of the danger of using Scripture inappropriately.

Prayer

Prayer is one of the primary means by which we can determine God’s leading. James 1:5 says that if anyone lacks wisdom (the ability to determine the right course of action), he should ask God, and God will freely and gladly respond to his request. Jesus, after teaching His disciples to pray, reminded them of the need for perseverance. He then promised that “everyone who asks, receives; everyone who seeks, finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened” (Luke 11:10).

The Bible is full of examples of saints of the past who inquired of God when facing a decision and received the wisdom needed to take the right course of action (see, for example, the victories of King David recorded in II Samuel 5:17-25). Scripture also records the disastrous consequences when people jumped into action without waiting on God for direction (see, for example, the defeat of King Josiah recorded in II Chronicles 35:20-24).

The Holy Spirit

The Holy Spirit plays many roles in the life of the believer and one of the primary ones is to provide guidance. Jesus referred to the Spirit as the Counselor and indicated that He would teach and direct us. The Holy Spirit is a trusted counselor who confirms truth within our hearts by giving us peace and confidence to move forward. He will withhold this sense of peace if we are heading in the wrong direction.

Another primary function of the Spirit is to point out sin in our lives. Sin clouds our vision and distorts our view of things, making it impossible for us to see God’s leading. Worse yet, sin can cause us to be unable even to realize that our vision is faulty. When we allow Him the freedom to operate in our lives, the Holy Spirit acts with surgical precision to remove the sinful cataracts of our eyes and renew our vision.

Some Christians are uncomfortable trusting the Spirit for guidance because they fear it allows too much subjectivity into the process.

However, the role of the Spirit is to confirm within our hearts the objective truth of the Word of God. George Mueller, who cared for thousands of orphans in 19th century England and was known as a man of great faith and prayer explains, “I will seek the will of the Spirit of God through, or in connection with, the Word of God. The Spirit and the Word must be combined. If I look to the Spirit alone without the Word, I lay myself open to great delusions also. If the Holy Spirit guides us at all, He will do it according to the Scriptures and never contrary to them.”

The People of God

Fellow believers are another resource we can draw on to understand the will of God. Proverbs 20:18 reminds us to make plans by seeking advice. It is part of God’s design for the church that more mature believers and those gifted at teaching are to teach the Word to younger believers (1 Timothy 3:11-14). This mentoring approach not only communicates principles found in Scripture, but also shows us how to appropriately apply those principles in everyday life.

An example of the biblical pattern is found in Acts chapter 15. Differences of opinion had arisen in the early church regarding the extent to which Gentile believers should be required to keep the Jewish law. Leaders in the church met together in Jerusalem to seek God’s will concerning this situation. Acts 15:6 records that the apostles and elders met to consider this question. It was only after much open discussion that Peter stood up to address the assembly. Then further exchanges took place before the group finally reached a consensus decision regarding the direction they should take.

Circumstances

God expects the believer to use his mind in the process of discovering His will. One of the ways that we meet this expectation is to make sense of the world around us⎜the circumstances that come our way. Often, a common sense approach toward interpreting political, social, economic, or other events will guide us to the right plan of action. For example, a person may be considering adding an addition to his house, one that would take it to within fourteen feet of a right of way. If the local authorities pass an ordinance restricting construction within 25 feet of a right of way, then the person no longer needs to consider whether it is God’s will for him to build the addition.

We should also consider the circumstances of our existence. God has created each of us as a unique human being, with a complex blend of abilities, interests, and desires. Surely these factors⎜God’s design⎜ should be taken into account when determining His will for us. It is highly unlikely that God’s will for a short, slow young man with no interest in sports is for him to play professional basketball. However, a young lady who is extremely talented musically and has a strong desire to perform may well be led of God to use those abilities and to satisfy that desire by performing to His glory.

Conclusion

Although there is not a set formula for knowing God’s will, God often reveals His will in the ways we have considered. Equally important, if not more so, than the means of discovering God’s will is the mindset we have while searching for direction. God will bless us as we exhibit the following attitudes.

Submission. “Whatever it turns out to be, I’ll do it.” Some Christians wrongly believe that they can ask God for direction and then decide whether or not they want to obey the marching orders they receive. Others simply look for confirmation of what they’ve already decided they want to do. Either approach betrays a stubborn resistance to the Lordship of Christ in our lives. The fact is that God reveals more of Himself and His will to us as we walk in obedience. Remember that it is in the context of obedience that Jesus spoke of His new relationship with His disciples and the revelation of the Father’s will to them (John 15).

John 15

Humility. “I know I don’t have all the answers.” The story is told of an old sailor who repeatedly got lost at sea, so his friends gave him a compass and urged him to use it. The next time he went out in his boat, he followed their advice and took the compass with him. But as usual he became hopelessly confused and was unable to find land. Finally, he was rescued by his friends. Disgusted and impatient with him, they asked, “Why didn’t you use that compass we gave you? You could have saved us a lot of trouble!” The sailor responded, “I didn’t dare to! I wanted to go north, but as hard as I tried to make the needle aim in that direction, it just kept on pointing southeast.” Our pride tells us that we know best or that we don’t need anyone to tell us what to do. We must strive for a posture of humility that expresses itself in a teachable spirit and a willingness to learn from others.

Patience. “I’m willing to wait as long as it takes.” Determining God’s will is often not easy. It may involve waiting on God and wrestling with Him about the decision. Noted theologian and author James Packer reminds us, “ ‘Wait on the Lord’ is a constant refrain in the Psalms and it is a necessary word, for the Lord often keeps us waiting. When in doubt, do nothing, but continue to wait on God.” We can rest assured that God will never keep us waiting longer than is necessary to accomplish His purposes. However He knows that the process may be as important as the outcome.

Psalm 119:105 speaks of God’s word as a lamp to our feet and a light to our path. It is not referred to as a floodlight to illumine the road ahead. Often we have only enough light to take the next step on the path, but that is sufficient if we are willing to trust the One leading us. In this process of seeking God’s will, we would do well to remember the prayer of Richard of Chicester, a saint of the early 13th century: “Day by day, dear Lord, of Thee three things I pray. To see Thee more clearly, to love Thee more dearly, to follow Thee more nearly, day by day.”

Application Suggestions:
• Meditate on Psalm 119:33-40. List the verbs in these verses associated with God’s Word.

Psalm 119:33-40

• Choose an area in which you want to know God’s will. Based on what you have learned in this lesson, write down what you will do to discover God’s will.

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Growing Spiritually Pocket Principles

• 10 Pocket Principles 55 Pages 
  Price: $10.00

After responding to some e-mails, I noticed that my husband was asleep and Donald Trump had taken over where the Angry Stock Guy left off. Celebrity Apprentice, if you don’t know, is a competition between a group of men and a group of women, all famous, who want to please Donald Trump and raise money for their charity of choice.

As I watched the drama unfold, I realized several things. One, to my chagrin, I am really interested in watching this show and I am annoyed when it is interrupted by Tornado Warnings. Two, I have never heard of three-fourths of the celebrities competing. Three, the men are handling themselves really well and the women are acting like spoiled, loud children.

As I watched, I was analyzing my feelings and thoughts. (That’s what counselors do; it’s automatic.) I noticed that when the men were being filmed and were discussing their strategy, I felt peaceful. When the women were on, I felt anxious. I wanted to say to the women, “Why are you so cut throat? Why are your feelings getting hurt? Why can’t you just play nice together?”

About halfway through I realized that the reason for the difference in attitudes and interactions was the way the team leaders handled themselves.

The team leader for the men was a guy named Penn Jillette, who is apparently a famous magician. His regard for his team members was obvious. He took charge with quiet, strong authority. He placed people in roles perfect for them. He treated each person with respect. There was no sniveling, arguing, backbiting or dissension on his team. At the end, when Donald Trump asked him whom he would fire from the team if he had to, he reluctantly named two team members, explained why and then apologized to them for having to remove them. When one of the men responded angrily, Penn Jillette turned to him and said, “I understand, you are absolutely correct and I hope you will forgive me.” Then, when they went “off camera”, which is not really off camera, Penn Jillette again apologized to both men and asked for their forgiveness. He actually used those words, “Please forgive me.” He modeled humility and regard for others.

At this point, I was pretty impressed with Penn Jillette. Here was a famous person with a small ego and a strong character.

I wanted to know more about Penn Jillette. I wondered if he was a follower of Christ. So, I googled him. I was sort of surprised when I read that he is not only NOT a follower of Christ, but he is an avowed atheist. I guess I was surprised in a sad kind of way.

But like some atheists, Penn Jillette has left room for God. He confesses, “I am an atheist because I don’t know.” And I realized that what I was seeing in Penn Jillette was still the image of God. Penn’s inner sense of right and wrong was obvious and the way he related to people was a clear reflection of God’s values. Whether Penn Jillette knows or not, it is obvious that he is created in God’s image and he is reflecting that image more clearly than some of us who profess to be followers of Christ.

So, Penn Jillette, I will be praying for you. To know.

And I will be trying to reflect God’s image to others as well as you have.

And I wonder, if someone who doesn’t know reflects God’s image so well, how can we who do profess to know, do a better job as image bearer’s?
How do people see God’s image reflected in you?

(By the way, the men won the competition.)

One of our greatest needs is to have a purpose in life.

God has built into each one of us a desire to do something meaningful with our lives—to make a contribution. The American naturalist and author Henry David Thoreau wrote, toward the end of a life in which he could find no ultimate meaning, “most of us live lives of quiet desperation.” While his statement is perhaps overly pessimistic, it is generally agreed that most people seem to be seeking for something more out of life than they are able to find. The good news is that not only does God instill that desire within us, but He also has a plan for each of us to satisfy that desire and find great meaning and significance in our lives. Along with the astronomer Russell, we worship a God big enough to create the universe and gracious enough to design a special place for us in it.

God has a plan for each believer.

God grants both the need for meaning and the opportunity to find it. This has been part of His master plan from the beginning. As Paul wrote to the believers at Ephesus, “We are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so that we can do the good things he planned for us long ago” (New Living Translation, Ephesians 2:10). In the original language of scripture, the word “masterpiece” literally means “poem”. Think of your life as a poem written by God, with each day a new opportunity to do the things that He has planned for you to do. As living poems, we find meaning and significance in fulfilling the desire of the Author of the universe.

God’s design involves both privilege and responsibility. Philippians chapter two, verses 12 and 13 say, “Dearest friends, you were always so careful to follow my instructions when I was with you. And now that I am away you must be even more careful to put into action God’s saving work in your lives, obeying God with deep reverence and fear. For God is working in you, giving you the desire to obey him and the power to do what pleases him.” Note that the verbs are active on both sides of the equation. The believer’s role is by no means passive. As Paul reminds the Christians in Philippi, we have a responsibility to do the things that please God. However, he also reminds them that it is God who gives the ability to fulfill the responsibility.

God progressively reveals His plan for each believer.

Once we understand that God has things for us to do, we must think through how we come to understand what He expects us to do. The believer is not given a playbook at the time of salvation or upon being baptized or joining a church. In reality, the rest of the believer’s life is a process of discovering and doing the will of God. In His infinite wisdom, God reveals His plan more fully as we grow in spiritual maturity and understanding. This is similar to the work of an artist who starts first with the background and covers the canvas with broad strokes. Then he paints in the major points of interest. Finally, he fills in the details.

God’s plan for the believer has both an internal component (spiritual growth) and an external component (ministry). The internal is “being” and the external is “doing.” The internal component has priority. We must be what God wants us to be before we can do what God wants us to do. Ministry (the external component) is an overflow of the inner life. However, ministry is also a means of future growth. So we see a circle where spiritual growth leads to ministry, and ministry leads to more spiritual growth.

The general expectations that God has of all who follow Him are woven throughout scripture, in both the Old and New Testaments. These expectations generally focus on the believer’s inner life and include such things as maintaining an attitude of prayer and dependence on God, keeping ourselves pure, giving thanks in all situations, being kind and considerate to others, and so on.

Specific expectations, or details of the plan, often revolve around the good works (ministry) that God has planned for us to do. One of the primary ways that we fulfill our purpose is by using our spiritual gifts. Scripture makes it clear that God’s Holy Spirit has endowed each believer with one or more spiritual gifts in keeping with His master plan. As we develop and use these gifts to His glory, we are fulfilling our role in His plan. Other dynamics are also at work that help define God’s will in our lives (personality, interests, passions, etc.).

When it comes to discovering God’s will for their lives, many Christians seem most concerned with major decisions such as who to marry, what career to pursue, where to live, and so on. We don’t find this preoccupation in scripture. Rather, the emphasis there is on godliness and ministry. These twin pursuits provide a context in which to make the other decisions.

At each point along this path, God presents us with ministry opportunities that are appropriate for our level of spiritual maturity. Consider the example of a father who wants to teach his son carpentry. The father, himself a master craftsman, can see from the beginning the potential of his apprentice and the beautiful objects he will someday create.

However, he starts with very simple tasks. In the early years, the son’s primary responsibility is to watch his father and to help when asked. The father starts by teaching his son how to use simple tools. He gives him scrap pieces of wood to practice on.

As the son gains physical strength and maturity, the father increases the level of responsibility. At some point, he allows the son to begin using power tools. Once the son gains proficiency, the father gives him the opportunity to work on real projects, but always under the father’s close instruction and watchful eye. After many years of instruction and development, the son is ready to use any tool to tackle any project.

So it is with our heavenly Father as He develops His workmanship into workers. Just as a wise and considerate father would never give a young boy a dangerous power tool and leave him alone to complete a complex project, so our Father does not require anything beyond our capability. We see this pattern in the life of Christ as He worked with His disciples. From a relational perspective, Jesus asked his followers first only to trust in Him as the Messiah they had been looking for, then as their provider and protector, and finally as the One who desired and was able to work through them. From a ministry perspective, Jesus first took his disciples with him so they could observe. Gradually, He began to give them more responsibility and involve them in the ministry. Finally, He sent them out on their own.

Over a period of many months together, the conversations between Jesus and His disciples went from “Come and see” to “Follow me” to “Work with me” to the point where He could finally tell His disciples on the night before His crucifixion, “As the Father has sent me, so I am sending you.” And also, “You shall do greater works than you have seen me do.” It would have been absurd for Jesus to utter the last statements as soon as His disciples began to follow Him, but from the beginning His design was to prepare them to hear and respond to these words.

God works out His plan in the midst of the challenges of life.

If God’s only desire were to bring us safely home to glory, He could easily choose to arrange things so that Christians would be protected and immune from all the bad things of life. But because He desires for us to grow into His likeness, to be His agents for change in this world and to help accomplish His purposes, He allows us to face life as it comes and teaches us in and through these circumstances.

Challenges are a daily fact of life for the child of God. These difficulties come from any number of sources including our own sin nature, the fallen world, the sins of others, spiritual warfare, human limitations, emotional issues, and sometimes even from God Himself. Because of these challenges, the working out of God’s plan is not a smooth process. It is often not predictable, easy, or comfortable. In fact, the path we are called to follow is often difficult, sometimes painful, confusing, and dangerous, and may even appear to be a dead end at times.

There is much written in scripture about the role trials and troubles play in the Christian’s life. James, the brother of Jesus, wrote that we are to joyfully welcome difficulties as friends because of the good that they accomplish in our lives. Granted, this can be a difficult thing to do in the midst of the trial. But we should focus on the outcome, knowing that challenges, when responded to properly, produce perseverance, endurance, strength of character, and spiritual maturity. In short, they help conform us to the image of Christ. An important point to remember is that there is nothing that comes into our lives that cannot be redeemed by God for our good and for His glory.

To further understand the role of difficulties, let’s return to the earlier illustration of a painting. The artist starts first with the background and covers the canvas in broad strokes. Then he begins to add the details. A frequently used technique to add definition and focus to a painting is to use darker colors for contrast, adding outline, shadow, and depth. So it is with the difficult challenges—the darker colors—that God uses to bring greater clarity to His plans for us. Challenges are part of the plan. Difficulties give definition to the picture, and make it come more clearly into focus.

God links His plan for each believer with His greater plan for all creation.

Dallas Willard writes in The Divine Conspiracy, “It is always true that meaning is found, when it is found, in some larger context.” A further element of significance for believers is that we play a role in the larger scheme of things. It is God’s design to involve us in His unfolding drama of redemption. Ours are not simply unrelated bit parts to fill time between scenes. Rather we are players on the stage of human history with significant roles to play.

Throughout history, God has chosen to use humans to accomplish His purposes. We see this consistently throughout Scripture. Then it was an Abraham, a Moses, a Ruth, a David, or a Mary. Today it may be a Fred or a Tiffany or a Charles. Reading through the written record, we can plainly see how God had determined for people to be involved in His plan. It is often not as easy to see or even to believe that we also are part of His plan. But this is the startling truth.

When John the Baptizer came to prepare the way for the Messiah, he proclaimed, “Repent, for the Kingdom of God is at hand.” As Jesus walked and ministered among the people, He taught, “The Kingdom of Heaven is among you.” And so the Kingdom of God has already been established in the hearts and lives of those who have chosen to follow Jesus. And it continues to grow today as His Word goes out and more are brought to faith in Christ. As we fulfill His plan for our lives, we are doing Kingdom work. And Scripture tells us that someday we will rule with Christ when He establishes His eternal reign. Significant work indeed!

Summary

The things that we have considered should bring great joy to the heart of every believer. Each of us can have full confidence that our lives have purpose and meaning because of the following truths:

1. God has a plan for every believer, which He progressively reveals to us.

2. God works out His plan through and in the difficult challenges of life.

3. We are part of God’s larger plan for the whole world.

Application Suggestions:

• Meditate on Ephesians 1:9-12 and Ephesians 2:10.

Ephesians 1:9-23; Ephesians 2:10

• Write down how you see God working out His plan in your life right now.

• Set aside time to give thanks to God for His plan for you and the world.

• Look back at your life and reflect on how God has used challenges to work out His plan for you.

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• 10 Pocket Principles 55 Pages 
  Price: $10.00

jesus is quite the practical joker. if i ever swear i won’t do something, it’s pretty much guaranteed that in the next few years, he will take a bulldozer straight through that promise, with me chained to the front scooper gizmo, screaming all the way, and then it will turn out to have been a heaping spoonful of blessing-pants.

2003: “i will NEVER set foot in that campus ministry. they are a cult.” a few weeks later, i step in because they have free chili and i am hungry and lazy. then, i am going every week. a few weeks later i meet my husband inside that building. a few more months and i meet jesus there and the following year i am working full time and living in the house. as alumni, we now give a large amount of money every month to keep this “cult” running, pray daily that our kids will find a community like it when they get older, and even speak at their retreats when asked.

good one, emmanuel.

so i should have known that when i said, “ew, i will NEVER take a restoring your heart group. i’m a hippie jesus chick and don’t like binders and programs and i would NEVER spill my guts to a bunch of lady-strangers,” that i was essentially saying, “give me my name tag and my spiral-bound study guide, i’m IN!”

so a few years back, when wda introduced a new program, called “restoring your heart,” that was developed with the aim of discovering where you have been wounded, how those wounds have affected, and still affect you; and then grieving those wounds, and beginning to heal from them. i thought, that sounds great, i’m sure lots of people who had crappy childhoods will really benefit from that. but again, not for me. i don’t have any huge, glaring baggage that i felt like i was still carrying around. i have never been abused, haven’t dealt with addiction, never dealt with death or abandonment…none of the big headliner issues. i figured, nothing that bad ever really happened to me, so any issues i have are of my own doing.

Ironically, I kept hearing people I respected say, “i never realized ___ about myself until i did the restoring your heart group but….” and we’d hear other couples rave about the results. like: every, single one goes on and on about how much it has changed their lives. how much it sucks at first, but then what freedom and wisdom comes from it.
i started to think more about it. but i always came back to, “no, i really don’t have any wounds that i haven’t already healed from.”

all this has been playing out over the past 4 years. we have dealt with marriage issues, becoming parents, having conflict with friends and family and trying to think about how we want to raise our kids. lots of these issues seem to repeat themselves: hubs and i having the same types of fights again and again, me losing my cool at my son over the same stupid triggers, getting into misunderstanding with friends because i feel devalued. these sorts of patterns made me start wondering.

one night last month we called some wda-ers over for an SOS emergency marriage counseling session. after a few hours of talking through things and them asking questions, it finally hit me that i do a lot of the things that cause me and my husband and my kids pain (and will continue to) because i am wounded. not in any lifetime original movie kind of way, but just in a way that screams, “oh hey, this is a fallen world and sin and lies are everywhere and they are all over you. Didn’t you know?”

i came to the conclusion that while growing up i interpreted and received what i thought was truth the only way i knew how. in the process i was told, perceived, believed and reacted to many lies. lies about who i am. lies about who jesus is. lies about how god loves me. lies about shame and worth and safety.

it is really important to note here that there isn’t a human bad guy in this story. it’s not like my parents or a bully or a teacher ever outright lied to me on purpose to hurt me. and even though, sadly, that can sometimes be the case that people lie to and hurt us intentionally, we have to remember that they are victims of a broken world too. the only person whose entire identity is that of a liar is satan. he is where all of this crap comes from and it gives him amazing amounts of joy when he can convince us to swallow them.

every single one of us is a limping, burned, disfigured product of these lies. in the process we bang around hurting each other, even if we want only the best for and to love one another.

so in the process of growing up, and with the mind of a child, i interpreted false messages that wounded me. that taught me unhealthy patterns and unwise reactions. as kids we are constantly being passively programmed: taking what we see and hear and experience and feel and instantly interpreting it, with no conscious thought–with our tiny minds–into the worldview from which we will operate for the rest of our lives.

so, yes, a 3 year old programmed the brain from which 80% of my thoughts, assumptions and decision originate…awesome! that really explains so much.

satan is a crafty butwipe and he hurts us the most subtly as children, when we are too immature and unlearned to put words to the hurtful things and feelings that we come across. these unnamed things get cemented into our heads as “just the way things are” or “normal,” or, “truth,” and by the time we are old enough to “know better” (no, my dad didn’t love me less because he worked all the time, or no, my mom didn’t think i was stupid because she encouraged me to do better in school, or no i am not worthless because some bully kid singled me out), it doesn’t matter because the fallout from those unspoken lies has already tangled itself around so much of our operating system that it has become our truth, even if we “know better” in our conscious minds.

i would say the easiest people to hate in this life are those that target and harm children. well, the devil is the king of child predators and he started working on us from infancy. he has planted sneaky and evil lies in the hearts and minds of the smallest souls that never even knew they were in a war or had an enemy. it is disgusting and evil to the core. satan’s lies seek to harm us in the only lasting way that we can be hurt: by tearing us away from the truth of how much jesus loves us. it’s his only weapon and he wields it with impunity and skill.

it’s hard to imagine any damage being worse than what we read about in the papers or see on the news about the horrible and rare things that can happen to children, but i am realizing that every single one of us has been the victim of an even worse abuse: trying to have our hearts and minds stolen away from and twisted against our most perfect heavenly father.

and the sneakiest part is that these acts committed against us leave no outward signs, and the victims and eyewitnesses to them don’t even know they have even occurred. let me say it very clearly: satan is a disgusting, malicious piece of garbage and is the only one who hurts us with full knowledge of what he is doing to us and why he is doing it. he isn’t acting out of his own woundedness; he is acting purely out of his identity as a predator who wants to destroy us.

i was always afraid to talk about my “stuff” because mine “isn’t that bad.” i was afraid of looking like a pampered little complainer next to others who have suffered in more external or obvious ways. but you know what? i am just realizing that that’s a lie too. everybody has their own stuff and by saying someone else’s is better or worse than mine, i am attempting to judge what’s good and what’s evil based on some scale that my brain came up with. i seem to remember that doing that exact same thing didn’t work out so well for all of us when adam and eve first tried it out in the garden. and you know who was right there telling them to do it? plot twist! it was the devil there too.

i now hate the little saying, “if we all put our troubles in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d want to grab ours right back out again.” we are ALL living in a broken world and have been poisoned by it. every single one of us is lost. no one wins this contest of “who’s got it roughest/easiest?” because they have the “least” or “smallest” mess. it’s not an objective scale. we are all walking around with the same score: me-0, satan-1.

just like you can’t compare your physical pain to someone else’s because you CANT FEEL THEIRS, we can’t do that with emotional pain either. what wounded me is what wounded me and that’s all i have any control over or firsthand knowledge of. end of story.

so i am done keeping my junk in the darkness. that’s what satan wants anyway. for me to feel like i am a freak or that i am alone in feeling this way, or that i am lucky and didn’t really get hurt. that’s not truth and that’s not jesus. there is no shame in christ. he would never turn me away and say, “shut up, that memory of being humiliated in 8th grade was nothing; try having nails through your hands.” he is ever-comforting, always gentle, and wants to be with me FOREVER. there is nothing in my heart that he would ever dismiss or write off.

so i will be going through this class for 17 weeks with 6 other women, all strangers, led by another woman who has been trained by WDA people who wrote the program. i have committed to a serious covenant of confidentiality about the things i hear during our group about the other women’s stories, but i do want to share my own personal walk through this process in a public way a little bit in case any one else has ever thought their stuff was too big, too small, too ugly, too messed up or too anything to not address.

my goals: to stop some of the cycles of unhealthy behavior and recurring wounds that i exhibit, receive and inflict by discovering the lies and hurt that i developed these behaviors in response to. that sounded fancy. here’s what i really mean: to figure my junk out before i pass it on to anyone else or make it worse for myself. to walk more like christ.

the thing that finally won me over was hearing people I love get emotional saying how much they would give to have gone back and done this before they had kids. they would pay thousands of dollars to have known what their own wounds were so they could catch themselves in the moment of acting out of those wounds and hurting their kids as they were raising them. their grown children are already benefiting greatly from having more healthy and self aware parents, but stopping the cycle for the next generation BEFORE many of the wounds and lies are cemented in childhood is an invaluable opportunity that i couldn’t spit in the face of.

dear jesus, i already know what it feels like to have wounded my kids due to my own issues. i refuse to do that anymore out of my ignorance. will i still wound them? Inevitably, and tragically, yes. but i will have this stuff in the light, before my eyes and turned over to jesus, so its insidious power is lost. i might not ever get the cure on this side of heaven, but just knowing my diagnosis and what the symptoms of my wounds are will go a huge way toward breaking the cycle of their power to cause even more hurt.

i am so ready to start the painstaking process of asking the questions that lead me back down the tangled paths of emotional unhealthiness and identify where the stupid, backward messages started. to call out the lie and deny the liar. to claim the freedom that we have all been promised by the one who is truth. to trade in my scorecard of k8-0, devil-1, and redeem the inheritance that i was ransomed to: jesus-a billionty googzillion for ever eternity, satan-ultimate loser.

bring on my spiral-bound binder of class materials! i don’t expect this to be easy. i don’t expect it to be fun or solve all of my problems. i do fully expect jesus to show up and hold my hand and start turning the pixels of my heart one by one over to the truth side. it’s what he does, when we let go and let him, and he’s kind of undefeated at it.

here we go.

This Blog was written by a Restorative Ministry Participant.

WDA’s Restorative Ministry and Restoring Your Heart Groups are a vital part of many people growing in grace. Learn more about WDA’s Restoring Your Heart.